Milk and why I now will buy only soy products

I don't usually keep milk in my house, but because I recently had a weekend guest and my ability to produce food at any given interval is decidedly lacking, I choose to cover up this fact with the option of cereal (which we also had to buy when she got here because apparently my personal choice of cheerios which I keep on hand to munch dry right out of the box on Saturday mornings was too much like "sawdust" for her - yeah I sent her home with her own half eaten box of lucky charms).

There are multiple reasons my fridge is usually sans milk. The top three are I never drink it fast enough so it always ends up spoiling, I'm not completely lactose intolerant but I get a little queasy when too many dairy products start entering my eating cycles and I choose to save that small section of my food choices for ice cream and sharp cheddar cheese, and finally that weird ass crust that forms around the edge of the milk jug. I have always bought my milk in plastic containers. Gallon, half gallon, or that weird two serving size at the gas station, it is always a plastic bottle. I have seen milk in bags back home but maybe that was just a Wisconsin thing because my local store here doesn't have them. Maybe if I didn't drink directly from the container this weird crust process wouldn't happen. But lets face it when you live alone, with no dishwasher save your own two hands, breaking the habit of swigging any product straight from the fridge is mighty hard to break.

The reason this crusty, hardened milk substance is so disturbing to me is two fold. One, it's creepy to drink any liquid and have unsuspecting solids touch any part of your mouth. I have an overall issue with food substance (which is why I never eat Jello regardless of the amount of liquor it may or may not hold) which may be why this one is so icky to my. The second one I figured out today. I came home and slugged down the remainder of this weekend's milk before it got out of date and as I proceeded to lean over the garbage and brush the milk flakes off my lips I watched them fall to the top of my garbage (which was admittedly close to me since it's about time to empty it). As I looked at them I thought "Wow, that substance looks familiar". And this is when it dawned on me. What they looked like was my sheets right before I washed them after a weekend in with a boyfriend. Do I really need to spell this one out? I am trying to keep this relatively family friendly here folks. What I will say is that I'm pretty sure every person who might read this is familiar with that wonderful white spot hidden under the duvet cover.

The really disturbing part was the realization that two years of basically single in the city, with a few random exceptions, meant the closest I was coming (mind out of the gutter people!) to the "wonderful white spot" was crusty milk flakes in my fridge. From now on it's soy products all the way.