I'm swamped at work so of course I would like to take this moment to blog about the random things filtering to the top of my brain. I warn you now, I feel this is going to be a random configuration of one line statements that make no sense.
First: Changing ones relationship status on a social networking site is by far the most humorous thing one can do to get the word out. I got more comments on that update than any status change, blog, or twitter feed. But to be fair, it is the easiest way to share this stuff without having to call 90 of my close and not so close friends. And when I show up with a redhead in tow at an upcoming wedding I won't have to explain who the hell he is.
If I ruled the world (oh how scary that would be!) I would make it one of my first executive decisions to outlaw the words "Lake Effect" and "Wintry Mix". I would also make it illegal to be colder than my age. You would have to pass a test to have babies, and smoking would be good for you.
I don't like to give up on books but I just had to put down "What's the matter with Kansas?" It's interesting but seems to be getting repetitive (and reading it on my morning commute was putting me to sleep). I think I've got the general gist of what's wrong. I've moved on to Dracula.
The failing economy has sent another harpoon into someone I know. My second close friend has recently found out that they will be unemployed in 4 months. At least they had warning I guess. The first one was an immediate layoff. This shit is starting to get scary. And from all conversations I'm overhearing, it's nothing to what is going to happen next year. Anyone want to help me build a bomb shelter? My construction skills suck but I come with a pretty nifty book collection.
People leaving sucks. I know it has to happen. I know it is not forever. I am still not ready. And no, world who wants to know, I am not quitting smoking just because my twin is gone, did you people really pay no attention to me before she was here?
Blogging on two sites is getting slightly exhausting. Though my count for who is reading in the myspace world has gone up so I either have a new friend out there paying attention or the same person is reading my posts over and over. Either way it's weird.
Work. Ah, glorious work. Blind leading the blind down an alley filled with sharp, sharp rocks. That pretty much sums it up.
Some how my winter has gotten as filled socially as summer usually is. Every weekend between now and mid January has something going on. How does this happen? I really am not that sociable, or at least I didn't think I was. Since I'm still spending most weeknights holed up in my apartment I feel I can still consider myself not that busy.
I am going to go now and drink lots and lots of coffee because it's Friday and Friday allows me to indulge in these things that I love. Have a great weekend.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Friday, November 14, 2008
Boyfriend?
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v1.1) defines "boyfriend" as...
1) a frequent or favorite male companion; beau.
2) a male friend.
3) a male lover.
while supposedly American Heritage Dictionary (though the info was on the same site) defines it as...
1) A favored male companion or sweetheart.
2) A male friend.
Whatever the definition is, I think I may have somehow gotten one. I know, I know, I write this as though I randomly found a $2 lottery ticket, or picked up ringworm, sorry it's just still a little weird.
I am terrible at labeling my interactions with people and usually avoid it at all costs. I don't need to know that you are my "boyfriend" to have sex with you. I just need to know that you are not having sex with lots of other random people. Or if you are, that we both know it and are cool with it. And, on a side note, though I'm not sure it's your business or you even care, since there is no actual sex in this story yet I don't see why all this freaking matters. However, it has been pointed out to me that apparently this living a non-labeled existence makes other people slightly insecure. Whatever. So in order to be a better, more caring person, I have been trying out the term. Ironically though, if you behave like a teenager I then apparently follow suit, because I am lightly using the term with everyone but the actual boy. (insert exasperated sigh here).
Seriously. Is this stuff always this complicated/ridiculous?
But to be fair to the internet world I figured I should at least share a bit of what is going on. Met boy. Like boy. Spending quite a bit of time with boy. Boy seems to like me. In fact, boy tells me this almost all the time. This is good. That is where we are at.
However, as with all things dramalicious, it doesn't even come close to ending there. As this is 2008 the internet has of course infected my social interactions. It started with MySpace. I had a MySpace page a long time ago and abandoned it quickly after discovering the interface sucked. Since then I have become a dedicated Facebook addict. The boy though is still a MySpace user, so I booted back up the old page, updated it, and actually started blogging on it. But since he is the only one I think reading it the posts are pretty much centered around him or things we do. Mostly I do this to amuse him and to share with him things I want to say but can't figure out in actual conversation.
Then his roommate built a fan page for him on FB. So of course, I had to go and become a fan of his. It seemed only fair. On his fan page is a link to his Twitter account. And here is where the downward spiral begins. I am also on Twitter but use it only rarely (though I'm trying to update it more now). So I decided not to follow him publicly and instead type the feed directly in my toolbar so that I can keep up with his not so innermost thoughts without him knowing. Sound dangerous yet? Just wait.
Introduce into the situation a friend of his, we'll call Jane. There is a long, convoluted story about why I think that I don't like Jane and why I think she may be trying to date my new boyfriend (wow it even feels weird to type) but I will keep that for in person story telling time. Lets just say I have a pretty strong gut instinct that this girl is no good.
So the other day I decide to see who is a follower of his Twitter feed and lo and behold there is her mug shot smirking out at me. Obviously the next step is to then go see what she has to say, right? Well even if you think that is not the logical next step, that is where this story takes us. And to make it even more ridiculous, I decide to page back through the history to the night when all these untrusting feelings about her started and begin to try and dissect her updates. Way over analyzing. I know. I still freaking did it. And know I'm stuck with the knowledge in my head. Though to be fair it isn't even actual knowledge. It's fucking Twitter updates.
But in the end all that really matters is I met a boy. We went to the zoo. We are spending Thanksgiving together with friends. I like this boy. This boy likes me. Life is good.
1) a frequent or favorite male companion; beau.
2) a male friend.
3) a male lover.
while supposedly American Heritage Dictionary (though the info was on the same site) defines it as...
1) A favored male companion or sweetheart.
2) A male friend.
Whatever the definition is, I think I may have somehow gotten one. I know, I know, I write this as though I randomly found a $2 lottery ticket, or picked up ringworm, sorry it's just still a little weird.
I am terrible at labeling my interactions with people and usually avoid it at all costs. I don't need to know that you are my "boyfriend" to have sex with you. I just need to know that you are not having sex with lots of other random people. Or if you are, that we both know it and are cool with it. And, on a side note, though I'm not sure it's your business or you even care, since there is no actual sex in this story yet I don't see why all this freaking matters. However, it has been pointed out to me that apparently this living a non-labeled existence makes other people slightly insecure. Whatever. So in order to be a better, more caring person, I have been trying out the term. Ironically though, if you behave like a teenager I then apparently follow suit, because I am lightly using the term with everyone but the actual boy. (insert exasperated sigh here).
Seriously. Is this stuff always this complicated/ridiculous?
But to be fair to the internet world I figured I should at least share a bit of what is going on. Met boy. Like boy. Spending quite a bit of time with boy. Boy seems to like me. In fact, boy tells me this almost all the time. This is good. That is where we are at.
However, as with all things dramalicious, it doesn't even come close to ending there. As this is 2008 the internet has of course infected my social interactions. It started with MySpace. I had a MySpace page a long time ago and abandoned it quickly after discovering the interface sucked. Since then I have become a dedicated Facebook addict. The boy though is still a MySpace user, so I booted back up the old page, updated it, and actually started blogging on it. But since he is the only one I think reading it the posts are pretty much centered around him or things we do. Mostly I do this to amuse him and to share with him things I want to say but can't figure out in actual conversation.
Then his roommate built a fan page for him on FB. So of course, I had to go and become a fan of his. It seemed only fair. On his fan page is a link to his Twitter account. And here is where the downward spiral begins. I am also on Twitter but use it only rarely (though I'm trying to update it more now). So I decided not to follow him publicly and instead type the feed directly in my toolbar so that I can keep up with his not so innermost thoughts without him knowing. Sound dangerous yet? Just wait.
Introduce into the situation a friend of his, we'll call Jane. There is a long, convoluted story about why I think that I don't like Jane and why I think she may be trying to date my new boyfriend (wow it even feels weird to type) but I will keep that for in person story telling time. Lets just say I have a pretty strong gut instinct that this girl is no good.
So the other day I decide to see who is a follower of his Twitter feed and lo and behold there is her mug shot smirking out at me. Obviously the next step is to then go see what she has to say, right? Well even if you think that is not the logical next step, that is where this story takes us. And to make it even more ridiculous, I decide to page back through the history to the night when all these untrusting feelings about her started and begin to try and dissect her updates. Way over analyzing. I know. I still freaking did it. And know I'm stuck with the knowledge in my head. Though to be fair it isn't even actual knowledge. It's fucking Twitter updates.
But in the end all that really matters is I met a boy. We went to the zoo. We are spending Thanksgiving together with friends. I like this boy. This boy likes me. Life is good.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Facebook: From Ghost Ask to De-Friending
I’ve been having this conversation for a while amongst my real life friends and after reading Schmidlap’s post today I figured there wasn’t a better time to finally get it out of my head and into the world.
I joined Facebook sometime in the Spring semester of my senior year of college as a way to keep in touch with the small handful of folks that I had met and had an actual, genuine interest in keeping in touch with. My friend list for the first 6 months probably never got higher than 15 and that was fine by me.
Fast forward to today. It hasn’t grown that much but I am up to 90 “close and personal” Facebook friends. That first group that I joined for? Yeah, barely even talk to them anymore, just a random comment here and there, but as each season passes even that gets less and less. And with this growing group and growing usage amongst a population not originally intended (a year or so back FB changed their rules that you could use any old email to start up an account, previously you had to have a high school or college email) has come the ghost ask.
The ghost ask is when you receive (or send) that friend request out to an old classmate, coworker, guy who rode the same bus as you 20 years ago. It comes with no personalized message, no reminder of who the hell they are. To make a ghost ask complete however is once accepted all conversation ceases. Not a word is said, not a comment made, not a hey how ya doin? Nothing.
Where does this come from? Is it our need to expand our superficial ranking in an imaginary world? Do we think that maybe we might actually want to talk with this person but when confronted with the option realize we have nothing to say? Do we want to show where we are, what we’ve done, accomplishments, hot new tattoos all without having to actually interact or attend some dreadful reunion where these things used to take place? I’ll admit, I’ve done it. I’ve sent out requests because I saw that we had 3…4…7 friends in common and that’s it. I hadn’t thought of this person in 15 years until my handy “People You May Know” sidebar suggested them. Some days I wonder how many of the 90 people listed are actually my friends.
On another Facebook related rant, and the actual reason I began writing this, another phenomenon has recently caught my attention. People are “de-friending” each other over status updates. Yup, that’s right, status updates. It’s the one line statement we update constantly to tell our imaginary online world what we are doing or thinking or throwing things at. Some are more witty than others, but it is a nice easy way to keep your fingers on the pulse of your network. I personally like to post music lyrics every once in awhile and see which of my friends make a comment or finish the line.
It’s also a quick and easy way to find out that many of your ghost ask friends have very, very different views from you. And in these heated and trying times, when lines are being drawn and fences built around political beliefs, we as a nation are standing up and silently de-friending those we don’t agree with. It’s almost comical. I’ve almost done it. It is only the grossly unattractive addiction of seeing what ridiculous thing they could possibly come up with that has kept me from hitting the “x” on our cyber friendship.
The only saving grace is that for the majority of these folks I will never actually interact with them (save for one unfortunate family member).
I joined Facebook sometime in the Spring semester of my senior year of college as a way to keep in touch with the small handful of folks that I had met and had an actual, genuine interest in keeping in touch with. My friend list for the first 6 months probably never got higher than 15 and that was fine by me.
Fast forward to today. It hasn’t grown that much but I am up to 90 “close and personal” Facebook friends. That first group that I joined for? Yeah, barely even talk to them anymore, just a random comment here and there, but as each season passes even that gets less and less. And with this growing group and growing usage amongst a population not originally intended (a year or so back FB changed their rules that you could use any old email to start up an account, previously you had to have a high school or college email) has come the ghost ask.
The ghost ask is when you receive (or send) that friend request out to an old classmate, coworker, guy who rode the same bus as you 20 years ago. It comes with no personalized message, no reminder of who the hell they are. To make a ghost ask complete however is once accepted all conversation ceases. Not a word is said, not a comment made, not a hey how ya doin? Nothing.
Where does this come from? Is it our need to expand our superficial ranking in an imaginary world? Do we think that maybe we might actually want to talk with this person but when confronted with the option realize we have nothing to say? Do we want to show where we are, what we’ve done, accomplishments, hot new tattoos all without having to actually interact or attend some dreadful reunion where these things used to take place? I’ll admit, I’ve done it. I’ve sent out requests because I saw that we had 3…4…7 friends in common and that’s it. I hadn’t thought of this person in 15 years until my handy “People You May Know” sidebar suggested them. Some days I wonder how many of the 90 people listed are actually my friends.
On another Facebook related rant, and the actual reason I began writing this, another phenomenon has recently caught my attention. People are “de-friending” each other over status updates. Yup, that’s right, status updates. It’s the one line statement we update constantly to tell our imaginary online world what we are doing or thinking or throwing things at. Some are more witty than others, but it is a nice easy way to keep your fingers on the pulse of your network. I personally like to post music lyrics every once in awhile and see which of my friends make a comment or finish the line.
It’s also a quick and easy way to find out that many of your ghost ask friends have very, very different views from you. And in these heated and trying times, when lines are being drawn and fences built around political beliefs, we as a nation are standing up and silently de-friending those we don’t agree with. It’s almost comical. I’ve almost done it. It is only the grossly unattractive addiction of seeing what ridiculous thing they could possibly come up with that has kept me from hitting the “x” on our cyber friendship.
The only saving grace is that for the majority of these folks I will never actually interact with them (save for one unfortunate family member).
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Apple Marketing team should get an award
I'm cheating with today's post. I started blogging again in MySpace figuring it would give me another space to express a different tone and today I'm just cutting and pasting the same damn thing over to JJ's World. I know it's lame and I'm sorry. I promise to be more original in the future. But for now, here it is...
So I have a confession to make. I am a sucker for an Apple commercial. Specifically the ones with music. These are usually the ones for one of the many i-pod like gadgets they keep trying to convince me I need. And while I haven't yet succumbed to their advertising and purchased a new player (though I really wanted the Touch for awhile) I have downloaded 5 of the damn songs. I've even created a playlist on my iPod so I can find them whenever I want.
So far it consists of One, Two, Three Four by Feist; Music is my Hot Hot Sex by CSS; New Soul by Yael Naim; and Shut up and Let Me Go by The Ting Tings. And last night the list became five when I downloaded Bruises by Chairlift.
Really the folks in their marketing department should get a medal.
So I have a confession to make. I am a sucker for an Apple commercial. Specifically the ones with music. These are usually the ones for one of the many i-pod like gadgets they keep trying to convince me I need. And while I haven't yet succumbed to their advertising and purchased a new player (though I really wanted the Touch for awhile) I have downloaded 5 of the damn songs. I've even created a playlist on my iPod so I can find them whenever I want.
So far it consists of One, Two, Three Four by Feist; Music is my Hot Hot Sex by CSS; New Soul by Yael Naim; and Shut up and Let Me Go by The Ting Tings. And last night the list became five when I downloaded Bruises by Chairlift.
Really the folks in their marketing department should get a medal.
Friday, October 24, 2008
What are you doing this weekend?
A few awesome looking things happening in Chicago that I wanted to share in case anyone is looking for something to do. First up on Saturday, dust off your inner geek and come check out the first annual Windy City Comicon, come on, you know you want to! Okay, maybe you don't want to, but I do and it would help if I had some company :)
If that's not your style then on Sunday how about clearing off some of those overburdened book shelves and dropping them off at the Great American Book Drive! (and on the 29th there seems to be a book swap...hmmm.....). It's a good cause, and you might get to run into one of my favorite bloggers who is the one that first shared the event with me.
Personally, I'm going to try and do both (since this week is a bye week for the Bears and all...oh dear god did I just say that!). Though I also have 2 a.m. plans possibly on Saturday night so we'll see how it all goes.
Whatever you do I hope you do it well.
If that's not your style then on Sunday how about clearing off some of those overburdened book shelves and dropping them off at the Great American Book Drive! (and on the 29th there seems to be a book swap...hmmm.....). It's a good cause, and you might get to run into one of my favorite bloggers who is the one that first shared the event with me.
Personally, I'm going to try and do both (since this week is a bye week for the Bears and all...oh dear god did I just say that!). Though I also have 2 a.m. plans possibly on Saturday night so we'll see how it all goes.
Whatever you do I hope you do it well.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Just a quick green thought
I'm so busy at work I think my head might explode (though that might have something to do with the hangover I'm fighting through today) but I read an article by Thomas L. Friedman out of the Times that I wanted to share a section of. I thought this paragraph was great and would love to see it happen come next January. Read the whole article here.
Lastly, we need the next president to be an energy efficiency trendsetter,
starting by reinventing the inaugural parade. Get rid of the black stretch limos
and double-plated armored Chevy Tahoes inching down Pennsylvania Avenue.
Instead, let the next president announce that he will use no vehicles on
inauguration day that get less than 30 miles per gallon. He could invite all car
companies to participate in the historic drive with their best available
American-made, fuel-efficient, innovative vehicle.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Customer Service
Two posts in one day! This is what happens when you have a busy weekend I guess. This post revolves around the sometimes elusive concept of customer service. Is there such a thing as too much, and at what point do you say this place sucks? A friend and I have had similar experiences recently which prompted this writing and which I will share with you now.
Great customer service is usually pretty easy to recognize. It's the person that calls you back after an order to make sure it was installed/delivered/set up correctly. It's the person that goes the extra step to find your product (and maybe have it sent over) instead of saying that since it's not physically in their store there is nothing they can do. The cashiers that remember your name, the barista's that know my coffee order so at 7 a.m. I just have to nod. These are the folks that make the term customer service a reality.
Crappy customer service is equally easy to spot. The nameless, faceless voice on the other end of the phone who puts you on hold for 10 minutes only to say, sorry the office you need closed 5 minutes ago, please call them tomorrow. The cashier's who congregate together gossiping while lines form and then never makes eye contact and screws up your order because they are too busy texting/talking/finding lost braincells. The bar tender who ignores you all night long, before you have even had a chance to tip the first round or make any kind of contact.
We have all experienced the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to the customer service world. Where it all begins to get sticky however is in the middle zone. This is the place that you frequent because it's off the beaten path, or it's the non-corporate coffee shop in a sea of Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks. Maybe you like to support small businesses, or maybe they make the best philly cheese steak this side of the Schuylkill River. It's the place where you save your pennies each week so you can tip big when you're there. Whatever it is, whatever they sell, it's a place that you have marked as your own - so what do you do when the service starts to go downhill?
It starts small - you order a coffee and a bagel, chatting aimlessly with the guy behind the counter about the weekend and then step to the side to wait....and wait....and wait. Seems during the chatting the bagel order has slipped through some crack either physical or mental, lost either way. They see you still standing, realize their mistake and are really sorry. They quickly make it, offering many apologies and how about a cup of coffee to go with it? Well, the coffee was the one thing they already got you, so no that doesn't really do you any good. You wave off the apologies, insist it's no big deal, and move on with your day. Because it really is not a big deal in the scheme of life. It's a delayed bagel, not a lost job, not a missile aimed at your home, a bagel. And deep inside you want to give them the benefit of the doubt, you want to be one of the insiders that thinks "Hey I know these guys, they know me, it's all good", but is it?
What happens when your order starts to get forgotten on a semi regular basis? When you get it to go only to realize 45 minutes later (and already at your desk at work) that your cinnamon raisin bagel smells suspiciously like blueberries? Or when your bartender takes your presence for granted, because hell you're always there so you must not mind, and lets you sit for 15-20 minutes fiddling with an empty beer bottle while they chat away the evening with the cook, or another customer, or texting on their cell phone (Really? My cash is not better than a text message?).
The last thing you want to do is be "That Customer". The one they bitch about when they see you through the glass. You want to empathize and sympathize and all the other izes you can think of. You want to be a part of the working machine, part of the inner circle. Maybe you've worked this kind of job, or something similar, you know how much of a prick most folks can be, and hell you have even vowed to never be like that.
But at some point it happens. At some point the voice inside your head says "Yup, this job probably pays crap. And the hours undoubtedly are no fun. But in the end it is your job to give me coffee/beer/product of any kind and right now you suck at it". What do you do when you reach that point? When the "cool" factor of the institution is drowned out by the annoyingness of having your order messed up, your presence forgotten? Do you abandon your territory? Do you stand up and say something risking being moved into a new category of customer? Do you swallow it and wait and blog about it in the meantime?
Great customer service is usually pretty easy to recognize. It's the person that calls you back after an order to make sure it was installed/delivered/set up correctly. It's the person that goes the extra step to find your product (and maybe have it sent over) instead of saying that since it's not physically in their store there is nothing they can do. The cashiers that remember your name, the barista's that know my coffee order so at 7 a.m. I just have to nod. These are the folks that make the term customer service a reality.
Crappy customer service is equally easy to spot. The nameless, faceless voice on the other end of the phone who puts you on hold for 10 minutes only to say, sorry the office you need closed 5 minutes ago, please call them tomorrow. The cashier's who congregate together gossiping while lines form and then never makes eye contact and screws up your order because they are too busy texting/talking/finding lost braincells. The bar tender who ignores you all night long, before you have even had a chance to tip the first round or make any kind of contact.
We have all experienced the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to the customer service world. Where it all begins to get sticky however is in the middle zone. This is the place that you frequent because it's off the beaten path, or it's the non-corporate coffee shop in a sea of Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks. Maybe you like to support small businesses, or maybe they make the best philly cheese steak this side of the Schuylkill River. It's the place where you save your pennies each week so you can tip big when you're there. Whatever it is, whatever they sell, it's a place that you have marked as your own - so what do you do when the service starts to go downhill?
It starts small - you order a coffee and a bagel, chatting aimlessly with the guy behind the counter about the weekend and then step to the side to wait....and wait....and wait. Seems during the chatting the bagel order has slipped through some crack either physical or mental, lost either way. They see you still standing, realize their mistake and are really sorry. They quickly make it, offering many apologies and how about a cup of coffee to go with it? Well, the coffee was the one thing they already got you, so no that doesn't really do you any good. You wave off the apologies, insist it's no big deal, and move on with your day. Because it really is not a big deal in the scheme of life. It's a delayed bagel, not a lost job, not a missile aimed at your home, a bagel. And deep inside you want to give them the benefit of the doubt, you want to be one of the insiders that thinks "Hey I know these guys, they know me, it's all good", but is it?
What happens when your order starts to get forgotten on a semi regular basis? When you get it to go only to realize 45 minutes later (and already at your desk at work) that your cinnamon raisin bagel smells suspiciously like blueberries? Or when your bartender takes your presence for granted, because hell you're always there so you must not mind, and lets you sit for 15-20 minutes fiddling with an empty beer bottle while they chat away the evening with the cook, or another customer, or texting on their cell phone (Really? My cash is not better than a text message?).
The last thing you want to do is be "That Customer". The one they bitch about when they see you through the glass. You want to empathize and sympathize and all the other izes you can think of. You want to be a part of the working machine, part of the inner circle. Maybe you've worked this kind of job, or something similar, you know how much of a prick most folks can be, and hell you have even vowed to never be like that.
But at some point it happens. At some point the voice inside your head says "Yup, this job probably pays crap. And the hours undoubtedly are no fun. But in the end it is your job to give me coffee/beer/product of any kind and right now you suck at it". What do you do when you reach that point? When the "cool" factor of the institution is drowned out by the annoyingness of having your order messed up, your presence forgotten? Do you abandon your territory? Do you stand up and say something risking being moved into a new category of customer? Do you swallow it and wait and blog about it in the meantime?
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