Long winded cult invitation***

So I'm trying to sell some of my stuff on Craigslist once again. I have found that I am notoriously bad at this because A) I never take the time to write good descriptions, B) I rarely add pictures which is key to getting folks to your ad to begin with, and C) most of my stuff is pretty crappy.

But this time it wasn't just something I could shove in a box, or in the back of the closet and forget about so I decided to try once again to get through the magic gates and become a bonified craigslist seller (instead of just they buyer I've been up until now).

See what I'm selling is a day bed. Yup a whole goram* bed. You can see (hopefully)why this would be something that can not just be stepped around day after day. I own this because I originally used it as a bed in my studio and then as a couch in my one bedroom. But recently I have come into the good fortune to get an actual couch (a real live grown up piece of furniture!) so have dissasembled the day bed and leaned it up against the wall. In my bedroom. And it's starting to get really annoying.

So I got my shit together and posted it in the furniture section along with a ridiculously heavy and large wall mirror (most likely best for a mantle, unless you really trust yourself and your wall studs) and 2 DVD storage units. I figured if I was going to post one thing I might as well try and get a few other odds and ends out the door.

16 or so hours after it goes up I get a reply. Yippee, I think, I might actually make some spending cash to make up for Printers Row**. I read through the reply and it seems harmless enough. Woman looking actually for immediate bedding for two (some Church thing, I specifically made sure not to ask about it) and wondered if another bed would fit underneath. I replied I wasn't sure, I had stored boxes under there and so maybe a mattress flat on the floor would work, but I would measure when I got home to make sure. And if she could get it by tomorrow I would knock $25 off the price (I had listed it as negotaible and she had asked).

Her reply is that they are really looking for something to fit a rolling trundle bed under so she is going to pass on the one I have for sale. I could of left it at that. I could of walked away, deleted her emails, and never thought about it again. But (obviously) I didn't. I thought it would be polite to reply, to indicate I had received her turning down of the bed. I wrote...
"Sorry it won't work out, good luck in your search!
Cheers
Gradual Instant's actual name"

That's It. One little sentance. Thought it was a nice, quick wrap up. I moved my brain back to square one and hoped someone else might be able to come and buy this damn thing.

But then it happens. I go back to check my email and see she has replied to my final reply. I open it up, thinking "Hey maybe they changed their minds, maybe they want to wait to see what the measurement is". But no. No, not at all. Instead I get this.

(Names changed in case any one reading this actually knows these people and it freaks me out they might be able to find me.)

Hey Gradual Instant's actual name,
I saw you live in Lincoln Park. My husband and I are South Africans who are part of Newfrontiers, a church family with more than 600 churches worldwide. We are busy planting a church with our leaders Jack and Jill Crazypants into the Lincoln Park area and I was wondering if you would ever be interested in visiting us one Sunday. Its very relaxed at this point. As there are about 30 of us meeting in a home. We’re planning on moving into a building probably early January/February next year and in the meantime are gathering people that are keen to be involved in a new church plant into the Chicago/Lincoln Park area. We meet Sunday afternoons between 3pm and 5pm at this moment in time. No pressure, but just wondered if I could introduce you via email to Jack and Jill and get them to send you some information... Okay, gotta run, we live in Winnetka at the moment but travel into the city to be a part of what they’re doing. Its very exciting... They live on Ashland and Fullerton area. We have three kids under the age of 6 and Jill has two kids (one of which is almost 2 and the other is about 5 months old.
Cheers,

1) I do not live in Lincoln Park. I made this clear I thought in the ad when it said "Location" and I did not put Lincoln Park.
2) WTF?
3) No part of this is appealing to me. Not Lincoln Park. Not church. Not kids under the age of 6. Nothing.
4) Really, WTF? I just wanted to sell some furniture to you, not join your crazy cult!

So I guess the end result is this; if anyone is intereseted I not only have a day bed for sale but I may have an in to a sweet kool aid kicking hang out on Sundays. I'll drop you off at the door for $5.




* I have been watching way too much Firefly
** Printers Row was amazing and hopefully I will get a post up about it before I hit the road for my next adventure, or at least a book list of what I scored. And yes, Neil is hysterically funny and witty in person, but no I did not get to meet him one on one.
*** When I started this post I meant that the actual lead up to the invitation took awhile, but after writing it all I think I may also be long winded, so I guess we have ourselves a double serving title today. Works for me. At least one of us is working overtime.

Pennies for a rainy day

There are a million ways to earn money off the internet (probably) and over the course of the past few years I've come across a handful of them. I always get really, really excited which quickly breaks down into really, really bored. But since I've started one back up again I though I'd come list them all here (mostly so I can come back in three months when I've once again lost interest and laugh at myself for my short attention span).

Squidoo: Build thing they call "lens's" that are like mini webpages. Get others to view your Lens and click on ads and such. Earn money from those ads. At one point I was up to about $7 I think, but now when I log in I can't seem to find it. They have a rule if inactive for a year the money goes back in the bank sort of thing so I'm guessing I lost it. Whoops.

MTurk: Amazon's weird little worker bee community thing. People (or companies, or robots, I have no idea) post tasks/jobs for us worker bees to complete. These range in payment from a penny to up to a dollar. My lifetime earning from them is $21.98 but at some point I rolled that into an Amazon gift certificate and now have a whopping 89 cents for a current balance.

Google Ads: You all know about these. Dedicate some space on your site/blog to let google pick out ads (theoretically matching your content) to fill in the space. Then hope your readers click on them every once in awhile to send some revenue back to your pocket.

Moola: By far the weirdest money making set up I've seen. Basically play on line games (a small handful, maybe 3-4) and bet/earn money. You can earn extra for all those regular things as well such as referring friends, signing up for offers, etc. The newest thing though is using their search feature allows you to earn revenue. They had this before and I tried it randomly but never seemed to win. The newest incarnation however has returned at least a penny (and a few 50 centers) each time I've searched today. I started at $5.05 this morning and now am at $7.66. This seems to be the easiest if I can stick with it. I'm hoping to get to $20 by next week!

So these are my four random money generating activities on the internet. What will I ever do if I don't have a desk job to find this stuff?

***Update: Looks like the Moola winning might have been a glitch. While I legitimately needed to do about 40 searches, I'm guessing the system won't read it like that and will probably take back my money. That's okay. If it comes back online I'll just make sure to use it for a few searches a day and not my major internet work.

Turns out someone used all those AOL disks for something besides coasters after all

Oh poor neglected blog, how I've missed you. I know it's been awhile and I apologize for my absence, life just kind of took over for awhile there if you know what I mean. I really don't have time even now to type but I just wanted to lay down a quick theory I'm working on.

I believe there must be a strong correlation between the necessity to print out every single email received (because you know if you don't print it and wave it around then it must not exist right?) and still using an AOL email account for your major personal interactions.

Just a thought.

Dilemma resolved!

Update on previous book post (wow, that doesn't narrow it down at all does it?).

So I was telling Boyfriend about the dilemma behind this post, and how I couldn't figure out where to ship it,when he chimed in that he always has stuff shipped to his parents house (some southern suburb). Since his dad comes to the city often for shows (music; listen not play)he just brings it up with him. And he went on to say it's too bad my family is so far (really not horribly far, but enough that I don't go home on a regular basis). Then he took the next step and completely surprised me by saying, "I can see how much you would love this, let me take care of it for you. I'll buy it and ship it to my parents". Wow. I am a big fan of Boyfriend.

Oh and randomly I figured out why my template was all wonky looking (bottom of this post)! Turns out there are two tabs at the top of the editor box, one says "Compose" (which is your standard WYSIWYG editor that looks like a Word document, and "Edit Html" which is well, where you can directly edit your Html. Turns out I had switched tabs unknowingly one day and it apparently stays like that, regardless of logging in and out, till you change it back. Learn something new every damn day.

What Craig taught me today

Randomly paging through Craigslist part time jobs today and I came across two that caught my eye. The first one (located here)was just really well written, entertaining to read, and spaced out nicely so the physical layout was easy to scan through.

The next one I'm going to cut and paste right in since I don't think it will last long. The tile was Bouncer/Security Needed and in case the link works, here ya go, but in case it doesn't....(all horrible grammar, spelling, and punctuation totally not mine). Man spam really is everywhere isn't it?

Bouncer/Security Needed
I need a security/bouncer for my wife.Her arrival date should be 17th OF May.I will prefer you to have your car available for this,I am offering you $650 as your weekly wages, So i will like to make one week payment deposit to you before her arrival so that i will be rest assured that i had secured your services now you are to make yourself available for 3 times in a week to her schedule for 2 hours each day.she will be going for her medical care and for other purpose which she might need you for as i stated on the AD so you are to secure her around for those period i stated to you...Also i want you to know that my client who is in the State will be sending you a cashiers check (which will be an over payment of $3500)so you will have to take the check to your bank and have it cashed once it gets to you and then after the check get cleared your bank you will notify me and then i want you to know that the remaining funds after deducting your wages will be used by my wife for her travel expenses,accommodations and any other expenses.

Get back to me with the following details of yours if you are okay with my terms,

Your Full Name
Address
City
State/Zip Code
Phone Number

The pay check can be send out to you immediately,Kindly let me know if you are good with this offer so that the paycheck can be forwarded to you as soon as possible and i will appreciate a quick response from you.

Thanks and please get back to me asap
Kindest regards

Moore Melborne


Also (and this is JJ again) what the heck happened to my blogger homepage? Something went wonky in the back end and now my WYSIWYG editor that I write in is weird looking (and to be honest kind of archaic looking as well). Hmmmm...to explore another day I suppose.

Swine Flu (because eventually I had to post something about it!)

see more Funny Graphs

Argh, it doesn't fit! Go check out the orginal here, it's worth it for a nice quick Monday laugh....

Neil Gaiman Friday

As many of you know I am a huge Neil Gaiman fan. I've read many of his works ranging from children's picture books, to graphic novels, to full on adult length novels and have loved everything he has done. So it is with great excitement that I came across a tweet from him (yes I even follow him on Twitter) stating that he will be making an appearance in Chicago for the Printers Row book fair. Even more exciting it turns out I will be in Chicago that weekend (I'm going to Bonaroo in June as well and was worried that dates would conflict). Events at Printers Row are free and open to whoever shows up except those held in the Harold Washington Library which, while still free, need a ticket to get in. Ticket information for Neil's visit will be posted on May 18th. I'm so excited I've even written in my planner to go online that day and try and get tickets so I don't forget (as it's the day before my monstrous work event I will probably be very scatter brained).

In my love for him I read his blog when I get the chance. Over the past year or so he has mentioned his work on the project "Who Killed Amanda Palmer" for the full story of how it came about click here. The end result is what sounds like a fabulous photography/art book with stories attached to the pics written by Gaiman. This sounds absolutely delightful to me so when I saw the post with the link to pre order I actually almost giggled out loud at my desk. The catch however is twofold. A) the book costs $34.99 plus shipping and I'm hard up to drop that much right now trying to save for all the things I want to try and do this summer (though the fact that it will be very, very limited printing is quickly pushing that fear out of my mind) and B) it will not be available until July so I have no idea where to have it shipped. I'm hoping (secret cross my fingers hoping) that I will be starting new employment around that time so I don't want to list my work address for shipping which is what I normally do since shipping to my house is a nightmare. Nothing larger than a letter is ever left for me which means a trip to the post office (if it's USPS) is involved and the post office near me is somewhere between the sixth and seventh layers of hell. If it's UPS or FedEx the gods only know what will happen to the package if I'm not there to receive it.

So I find myself in a dilemma. I could ship it to my mothers house though since that is in Wisconsin I won't be sure when I would be able to go get it, and I have a terrible time waiting for something once I know it's arrived. I could wing it and ship to the house or find a reliable friend with better delivery services than I and have it shipped to them. I think I'll mull it over through the weekend and hope that I come up with something (and convince myself to spend the money as well).