If I had a $100 Million Dollars (I still wouldn't pay this)

My first twitter update for today read "Attn all creative people. Please strike the name "lindsay" from all future productions, creations, & ideas in general http://tiny.cc/YgSp6". If you wait a moment to click the link (or promise to come back and finish the rest of this rant) I'll tell you what it's all about.

Remember football? I know it's hard, what with college basketball in full stride and baseball leering at us from around the corner, but just a few weeks ago we had the end cap to a crazy football season. In case you are still confused, I'm talking about the Super Bowl. For many of us out there, the Super Bowl is about one thing - the ads. For me this year it was about the game, but that's because I'm a Colts fan, and well that's another story all together. Back to the ads. I honestly didn't watch a lot of them but I do remember this one.



The E-Trade baby had apparently diversified his dating pool. It was funny. Not normally a big fan of babies or baby centered advertising, I'm not too creeped out by the E-Trade baby and usually find them a bit amusing (at least the first time, any ad I see more than about 3 times I'm usually done with). I saw it, I laughed, then I promptly forgot about it and whatever it is they wanted to sell me. And I don't think I can recall seeing it since.

And then today happened. According to Slate.com Lindsay "I have nothing better to do with my time and I'm desperate to be back in the spotlight no matter what" Lohan is suing E-Trade for, wait for it, A $100 MILLION FREAKING DOLLARS because, and I quote, "The claim seems to be based on the belief that, just like Oprah and Madonna, Lindsay Lohan has single-name recognition".

What?! Single-name recognition? You're freaking kidding me. Now, by my blogging about this I guess the devil has won. She is getting attention for it, which in the end is I hope the only thing she expects to get. But come on people, can we just freaking stop for a minute here. I know it's just entertainment bullshit, but don't we have better things to do with our time than sue for this crap? I don't know, maybe stuff like health care and making sure lunatics can't carry handguns around my college campuses and record stores. Homelessness, poverty, job loss, failing hospitals, homophobic, racist, misogynistic....do I need to go on?

This kind of shit exhausts me. Well first it makes me laugh, then it exhausts me. But at some point you just have to get over it and move on. And moving on is especially easy when the very next article is all about what happens if you're driving to your boyfriends house and have your ex-husband steer the car from the passenger seat so you can shave your nether region*. Dumb asses.



* I have a million others words that I could use and am comfortable using in everyday conversation, however in order to stem the rush of spam bots sure to find me I'm going with "nether region" for today.